Monday, November 16, 2009

That's SO Gay

First off, sorry for the delay. When I'm stressed I need to do work. When i'm finally relaxing i need to relax. not sure where blogging fits into those- although it can be very therapeutic at time :-)

Anyway I wanted to mention the "thats gay" habit. There's been ad campaigns and various discussions about the just un-cool habit of people to call things gay as a synonym for lame or stupid or annoying. also, there was an Office episode (lol). My friends, for the most part, have made a conscious effort to cut down this habit and I appreciate that. However, some of the people around me haven't- and that's insulting. And it's not just around me, it's anyone anywhere, especially when you never know who is in the closet or who actually is gay. It's like if some looks at a Jew doing something stupid and says "that's so Jewish". It's insulting, though I'm not personally offended, but still offending to the nature of who I am, and I ask my friends to chill out with it. It's not cool. I worked on it also, and I erased that phrase from my vocabulary. And I don't ask much of the people around me, I don't like who I am to be a burden, but this is just an insulting habit for people to keep up.

There are times where friends say it once, or twice, and it's kind of funny because I'm around and I'm gay, and this is a novelty within the Orthodox world and it's weird and funny to say something that you've always said and then realize someone in the room is actually gay. And yea, when you first realize it, it's funny. Unfortunately, that's really only at first, one time- maybe two- but it shouldn't be acceptable. And it shouldn't be only an effort when I - or anyone else gay- is in the room. Also because you never know who is gay around you, especially within the frum circles. It should be an effort always to just get rid of this habit that can be insulting and degrading.


  1. couldn't agree more, awesome post

  2. I agree conceptually 100%..
    Although on the other hand when someone does use such terminology does he really mean it in as degrading a form as you make it out to be?
    Even if is is said two or three times, it is still in a joking manner. And to live life and always be watchin our backs in terms of what we say is prob a good thing to strive for, but to put into daily practice is a lil unrealistic...

    yasher koach with the blog tho

  3. While I can understand the frustration with this phrase, I have a small objection to one detail in the post. The equation of "that's so Jewish" with "that's so gay" implies a simimlarity - but remember, being Jewish isn't prohibited. Please, don't take this the wrong way; I'm not witch-hunting. All I'm saying is that there is a very, very large distinction between using "Jewish" as an epithet and using "gay" as an epithet.

  4. OMG! One of my best friends is gay and now i have A WHOLE NEW WAY TO MAKE FUN OF HIM.



It Gets Better- Gay Orthodox Jews