So life has been pretty stressful the past few weeks, I am stage managing the YU play this coming week and also ran a Shabbaton while attending a best friend's wedding and another best friend's l'chaim. Mazal tov guys. Anyway, I wanted to say a few things that may seem pretty random, but I think this is the essence of my interactions with the world around me.
Let me explain. While I may have my opinions of your dress, behavior, actions, and approve or disapprove in my head, none of those things are important to me. Anyone who knows me in person knows that I have many friends- but also that these friends are TOTALLY random and come from all different walks of life, and currently live all different types of lifestyles. I don't care how you live or dress or act- those are all your personal choices, only if you ask for my opinion maybe I will give it. But in general, I accept you for who you are- and unless you really are not a good person, or do something to prove to me that you have little regard for others, would I rather not have you in my life. But seriously, almost everyone in the world is a good person if you just give yourself the opportunity to get to know them, and there is little to not do that, you will find that people are generally good. So give everyone a chance, it's usually worth it.
There's no reason to shut people out just because they may be different than you or have different values. If you're secure enough with who you are and how you act, then just because someone is different, doesn't mean they have to influence you or change your morals or values, so don't be scared.
(Sorry if this sounds condescending- I just am really happy with every single person that is in my life, and I wish others would also give everyone equal opportunity- or you might miss out on some great relationships!)
well put.. I think people are too quick to write each other off over pet peeves and mild disagreements, sometimes.
ReplyDeleteIt takes a strong person not to judge people even when they know they're constantly being judged. Kol hakavod.
ReplyDeleteyou sound young
ReplyDeleterabbi,
ReplyDeletecare to elaborate?
I think your attitude is a little what Chazal means when they refer to olam hazeh as darkness, thinking that wrong things are right, and thinking that right things are wrong. You say "I don't care how you live or dress or act- those are all your personal choices, only if you ask for my opinion maybe I will give it.", and it sounds all noble and great, but that is not the Jewish attitude. We are a family. We look out for each other. Kol Yisrael areivim ze laze- we are responsible for one another. It's not a "you do your thing, and I'll do mine and let's all hug and stuff." no! if you see someone violting the Torah (or going down the path that will eventually lead to sin) you should do something about it (or at least let it bother you- I don't know what the halachic details of rebuke to one another is these days). If someone is violating kashrus, Shabbos, not learning Torah to their best of their abilities, if someone is stealing or not giving kavod to our rabanim (or as you sometimes call them "the rabbis"), or heading down the path to chas veshalom violate marrying a non-Jew or homosexuality or any other sin, it should make you cringe. We accept every Jew, and because of that we do not accept every action and attitude. We are one people and one family, don't be so open minded to let our people fall apart.
ReplyDeletei thought this blog was about ur daily battles..... i don't really get the point here. basically, be nice to other ppl, YAY!!!
ReplyDelete